Inner Healing and Difficult Relationships: 5 Biblical Steps to Love | Pastor Joshua Angarita

💕 Path to Transformation: The Joy of Love

Base Text: Galatians 5:16-26

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INTRODUCTION: From Words to Action

We have already seen that God's purpose is to convert us into people according to his image, leaving the old man to be believers with Power, with thoughts of conquerors. Deciding to change is accepting the process of transformation. It is time to move from words to action.

I saw a meme as a mocking message: a pastor saying "as a new year enters, you will have blessing, your promises will be fulfilled", and the person responding: "Why did he say the same thing last year and it was not fulfilled?" Because it's not magic, it also requires action. The way needs to be paved for what is promised to arrive.

"This therefore I say and require in the Lord: that you no longer walk as the other Gentiles, who walk in the vanity of their mind, having their understanding darkened" — Ephesians 4:17-18

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1. HOW TO TRANSFORM YOURSELF INTO A LOVING PERSON

"And now faith, hope and love remain, these three; but the greatest of them is love" — 1 Corinthians 13:13

a) Love is the first fruit of the Spirit

• Love is a destroyed and damaged word with feelings or pleasures that have nothing to do with its meaning. Some think it's an emotional knot, butterflies in the stomach.

• Another misunderstanding: Love is uncontrollable. "Did I fall in love?" as if it were an accident. "What am I going to do if I'm in love? I can't do anything." Or the opposite: "I don't love him anymore." We talk as if love is uncontrollable, but the Bible says love IS controllable. Jesus commanded that we love one another. His words indicate that we control who we love.

b) Love is a dress

"And above all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond" — Colossians 3:14 (TLA: "Love is the best bond of union")

• Love is a matter of choice. It is something we can decide to have. If it were a feeling, we couldn't send it. But we can rule in an election. Love is a choice. It is controllable.

• Clothe yourself with love: In this verse "love" is Agape, the love of God that is above eros (passionate) and filial (fraternal). This surpasses human love. It is a sacrificial love.

c) Love is a matter of behavior

"Dear children, let us not love with words or lip service, but with deeds and truth" — 1 John 3:18

Very often we love with words, but not with actions. A young man told his girlfriend: "I love you, my love, so much that I would die for you." She replied: "Ah, Pedro, you are always telling me that, but you never do it."

Is it possible to love someone you don't even like? God often allows us to be surrounded by unfriendly people to teach us how to love. It is easy to love those who are good and loving, but if God is going to teach us to love, sometimes He will allow people who are difficult to love.

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2. FIVE STEPS TO LEARN TO LOVE

"You shall love your neighbor as yourself. Love does no harm to your neighbor; therefore love is the fulfillment of the law" — Romans 13:9-10

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STEP 1: Experience the Love of God

"That Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith, so that, rooted and grounded in love, you may be fully able to understand... what is the width, length, depth, and height, and to know the love of Christ, which surpasses all knowledge" — Ephesians 3:17-19

Rooted (rhyzoo): From the Greek ῥίζα (rhíza) = "root". It means to take root, to make stable, to fix firmly. Image: Like a tree whose deep root makes it firm against winds and droughts; Thus the believer, with his inner life anchored in love, is not easily moved.

Foundations (themelion): From the Greek θεμέλιος = "foundation, base of a building." Image: Not only a tree with roots, but a building on a solid foundation; The ground and basis of the Christian life is LOVE.

Knowing the love of God is understanding that from the little finger to the crown of the head must be filled with his love. If you don't love God, it is difficult to love another. "πλάτος, μῆκος, ὕψος, βάθος" (width, length, height, depth) form a picture of wholeness, showing that the love of Christ encompasses all possible directions.

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STEP 2: Forgive your Enemies

"Bear with one another, and forgive one another if anyone has a complaint against another. As Christ forgave you, so do you. And above all these things put on love... And let the peace of God rule in your hearts" — Colossians 3:13-15

Wonderful is to understand that every action has a chain reaction. If you hate, what you attract into your life is ruin, bitterness, sadness, bad thoughts.

But the text presents the sequence:

1. Supports
2. Forgive
3. Dress in love
4. You will have peace
5. Gratitude and joy

You will be greater when you forgive, not when you hate. A bitter heart is a divided heart. Every time you resent someone, you give them a piece of your heart, a little of your attention, a little of your mind.

Do you want that person to have a little of you? No. Then take it back, forgiving.

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STEP 3: Start Thinking Loving Thoughts

It means that we begin to be interested in other people's needs, pains, problems, desires and goals and not just our own. It's easier to understand another person when we walk a mile in their shoes.

This is a fact of life: Hurt people hurt people. If someone hurts you, it's because that person is hurt. What we need to do is look beyond that person's flaws to see their needs.

"Love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who despitefully use you" — Matthew 5:44

The people you would like to overlook are the ones who need love the most. When you see a rebellious child, they are trying to get attention for lack of love. If a person cannot get love, they will strive for attention. And if you can't get positive attention, you'll go out of your way to attract negative attention.

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STEP 4: Act with Love

"Love your enemies, do good and lend without expecting anything in return. If you do, the most high God will give you a great reward... You must be compassionate toward all people, just as God, your Father, is compassionate toward all" — Luke 6:35-36 NLT

How do you love someone who hurts you? You must ignore their faults. "In all humility and gentleness, patiently bearing with one another in love" — Ephesians 4:2

The Law of the Extra Mile: (Matthew 5:41) In the 1st century, Roman soldiers could recruit Jewish civilians to carry their equipment a Roman mile (~1,600 meters), which generated resentment. Jesus uses this everyday oppression to illustrate how to overcome evil with good, transforming forced obligation into generous service.

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STEP 5: Hope for the Best

"He suffers all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things" — 1 Corinthians 13:7

Expect the best even from people you don't like. For example, the parent who tells his child "you won't amount to anything, you're a fool" is setting the child up for failure.

True love can change your personality. Do you want to change your spouse? Treat it the way you want it to become.

• Do you want your spouse to be successful? Treat him like a successful person.
• Do you want your children to be intelligent? Treat them as smart and not stupid.

Love hopes for the best.

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HOW TO REVIVE LOST LOVE

Christ spoke to the church at Ephesus about the love they lost (Revelation 2:5). He gave them three steps to rekindle that love:

1. REMEMBER where you have fallen from
2. REPENT
3. RETURN to practicing the works you did at the beginning

These steps can also be applied to rekindle any relationship.

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SUMMARY: The 5 Steps to Love

1. Experience the love of God — Feel His love, not just intellectually, but in your heart
2. Forgive — Free yourself from the past to be able to love today
3. Have loving thoughts — Look at the needs, not the lacks
4. Act with love — Go the extra mile
5. Hope for the best — Treat others as you want them to become

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CONCLUSION

This message has a purpose: how to become successful people, how to change our defeatist thoughts into winners, how to be transformed in Christ to be better.

You can say "I'm stuck in a marriage that is dead or dying," that once there was love and there is no more. Believe in the resurrection power of Jesus Christ. Ask God to reborn those feelings. The power of Jesus Christ raised the dead can resurrect your relationship.

"Love is long-suffering, it is kind... It endures all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things" — 1 Corinthians 13:4,7